Long time no drinky [3 reviews for the price of one]

1. Two Figs.

It's what used to be Cabbages and Kings, was the Haugh Before that, was... etc. Bottom of Byres Road, weird space with two bits separated by a close door.

Two figs is run by the people that own the Left Bank on Gibson St, and has similarly high quality but somewhat more pub-oriented food. Excellent burger, awesome chips, good on-menu cocktails (haven't tried ordering off menu due to them having) West beer's on tap. Nice staff, some of whom used to work in Rio Cafe.

2. Blind Pig

In what used to be Whistlers Mother (do you notice a theme yet?), they're seriously about local quality food. The Sunday roasts are amazing, and well worth a trip to the restauranty bit for. Nice cocktail selection, although I'd still head to Bloody Mary's for a session. Beer selection is uninspired at best. The food outshines everything except the winelist, and it's priced that way.

3. Velvet Elvis

In what used to be an abandoned Butchers on Dumbarton Road, next to Pinxtos, opposite Bibi's. Like Blind Pig, they emphasis ethicallyish reared localish food. Same good-but-slightly-bland (Guinness, Budvar, Peroni yawn) beer list as the Blind Pig, an excellent and reasonably priced wine list and a few competent cocktails. The main selling points of this place are it's West-of-Crow Road location, the food and the jukebox. OMG the jukebox.

If you're just drinking, go to the 3 Judges. Unless it's Sunday and, like me, you hate shite jazz.

- Aidan

Whistlers Mother

Woke up this morning after a slight accident involving Barfly and thought I'd get some food in me. Thought "I haven't been to Whistlers Mother in a while". This proved slightly unfortunate as it turns out the place has bloody shut.





I know it had signs up for a while looking for new management but (I posted about it here in April) but I demand an explanation for this bullshit.

The Byre

I kind of liked the 500 Club at the bottom of Byres Road, however the service was always a bit iffy and the beer selection a bit dull. Now that it's the The Oran Mor Byre (or the Ooor Wullie Byre, or the Broons Byre or..) the beer is definately better. Trying to judge the quality of service on Monday night when there are 4 people in and there's no food (starting next Monday apparently) is a bit difficult but they're definitely friendlier than the 500 club staff and the fact that Colin "Mr Mor" Beattie owns it bode well.

The name is a little up in the air due to Stefan King suing, in a remarkably similar way to the Bloody Mary debacle a few years ago. If the way that worked out is any precedant I don't think there's anything to worry about.

In the interests of solidarity with people who aren't dicks, and getting to know each other better can I suggest a glasgowbars meet(piss)up at The Byre?
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Bar Square

So I ventured out of my drinking home that is Sauchiehall St last Saturday and ended up in Bar Square down in Merchant City. I'm pretty sure it used to be something else, but I couldn't tell you what, nor when it changed.

Anyway, it was pretty much what you'd expect from a merchant city bar. Designed for trendy, young people as, I presume, a pre-club bar. The drinks were pretty expensive starting at £3 (although the cocktails were quite reasonable!) and it was very dark inside! There was a DJ supplying the 'tunes' although i they were so run-of-the-mill I now can't remember what they sounded like! It was pretty quiet considering it was a Saturday night, it kind of gave the impression it was maybe struggling a bit. The clientele being a bit wide of its target market..there were some very camp guys (which I suppose was to be expected) a couple of neds, a few suits and a couple of girls who when you looked closely were probably older enough to be your mother.

We were momentarily excited by the 'outside but not really outside'...the bar is part of Merchant Square, so has access to the courtyard bit in the middle, where there were more tables and chairs. Of course its still technically indoors so its not like you can smoke or anything!

Whistlers Mother?

Walking down Byres Road in the glorious sunshine today I spied with my little eye a banner outside whistlers mother advertising it for rent! with a planned refurbishment! OH NOES! Does anybody know any more about this? I will cry if it gets shit, I love lazy afternoons there and the cafe does great food.


The Goat, Canvas (but not really), Blas

Well, last nights "spicy meat and a social few" totally-heterosexual-man-date turned into something slightly more epic, after leaving Kokuryo first stop was The Goat.

Staropramen at 3.10 was a bit steep, but it's tasty and was consumed in the rather pleasent surroundings. Couldn't get one of those comfy looking couches so we sat up stairs. Monday night crowd was mid-30's, most unobjectionable. After our second pint a loud obnoxious group came in and we decided to head round to the Tap (cause it was pissing down and it's close) for quieter, cheaper booze.

Imagine our surprise to find that the tap is gone, to have been replaced with something much more upmarket called Canvas! We didn't go in, being a little distressed at this turn of events, and did what any respectable pair of beer drinkers would do and decide to head for the 3 Judges for "just one more". They have a MySpack and don't actually look too bad. I'll probably try them for lunch at some point once I've gotten over the shattered memories of lazy summer afternoons.

Didn't get there, stopped in at Blas instead cause it was still pissing down and I'd been wanting to check it out for a while (it's just down from Beanscene) which was lovely and quiet, friendly staff and more reasonably (ie. sub £3) priced Staropramen.

By this point it was 11, we were on a roll and ended up in Jim's Bar in the QM (hurrah for life memberships) drinking the dead cheap bottles of Staropramen until "finish your drinks and move outside please" time.

The Hall

I went out again last night! (I just realised how much this community is going to highlight my excessive drinking!)

Anyway, yes The Hall. I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with this place! I worked next door for over a year so there was a time when i felt like i was in there every day! Plus side - i knew all the staff and got served quicker at the bar Bad side - well the same place all the time gets a bit tiresome doesn't it?

I realised last night i havent actually been there for a while! I usually go to play pool (even though i'm awful at it!) but last night's decision was aided by the fact that its Quids Thursday and whilst all the drinks aren't quite a quid it is very cheap! I did feel a bit old in there last night, and i'm not a student so not exactly their target market. I am so glad they got rid of all the garish decor last year tho, its almost a nice pub now. And they played Muse on the jukebox last night which kept me happy!

So yeah, its a bit...lame? cliched? whatever with the 'quirky' student features but it is cheap and cheerful so can't complain really! Plus i work for the same company so i have to say good things, right?!

(afterwards i went to the Garage, but the less said about that the better!)

chin chin!

So, given that I sometimes want to escape the beer soaked rut of Sleazys, the Note, Uisge and the Judges I sometimes stop by Booly Mardys for one of their tasty parma violet martinis. Sadly I don't know of anywhere else that does decent cocktails, and I could use another venue in which to fulfill my 50 cocktail challenge for the year.

Where do you go when you want something with an umbrella and an ABV in the 30-40% range?